Scrutinizing the Average Badboy
by AnEyeHidesInPlainSight
Summary: Somewhere along the lines of parties and hookups left Circe Russel hiding out in the dorm of The Marauders. And as far as Sirius is concerned, whatever else this girl is hiding is her problem; the rest he will gladly make his business. Throughout the year, The Marauders come to realize they enjoy spending time with Circe... and that's when it all hits the fan.


"My gratitude towards beginning-of-the-term parties are endless." Circe kissed the host's cheek before running off from the hysterically fun party. Honestly, the thrill of the chase slurred the bulk of her memory, but vaguely she recalled dodging several professors to reach the staircase, and down, down, down she went.

The trouble with seventh years' parties were that their dormitories always ended up being the highest up in each tower, which made for a very tedious escape. Plus, Circe's odd mix of beetle berry whiskey and gin had her tripping over the steps frequently, and she barely even recognized the fact that she was pantsless.

_"Petrificus Totalus!"_ Professor Pompley called from what sounded like two flights down. She heard a student, who obviously ditched the party earlier than the rest, thud to the ground. "Crud!" she heard him call. "I didn't do anything! Honest, I was just getting a late night snack!"

Despite herself, Circe chuckled at her fellow partygoer's misfortune. She waited as long as her nerves would allow before (quieter than before) speeding down the staircases.

She would have continued on her way had it not been for the two sets of loud footsteps coming at her from both directions. Circe panicked and began sprinting down the stairs quicker, head reeling and giggles protruding.

This carried on for a minute or so until she came across a door. How many had she passed? Twelve, thirteen? Was this the fifth year dorms now? The thudding grew louder and Circe decided gambling her encounters this evening was far better an option than landing herself detention for the next two months.

Last time she got caught, she'd been scrubbing the bottom of the lake's wooden boats for weeks. Luckily, the door swung open and she ran inside, giving no fair warning to whoever opened the door for her.

Once inside, Circe kicked it shut and moved towards the first four poster her eyes found.

"What are you-"

"Shut up." She snapped, crawling under the bed and pulling half a comforter down to remain covered. "Just cover for me, and I'll owe you big time."

As if on cue, the dormitory door was knocked on, and one of the boys opened it, greeted by a panting Professor Macmillan.

The charms teacher frowned at the faces that greeted him. "Are you hiding someone here, boys?"

"Not a soul, sir." A cheery voice said from the corner of the room.

"Unless you count our potted plant on the window sill, there. He's a shy one, I'll tell you-"

"Enough." Professor Macmillan said sternly.

Circe fashioned a tiny peephole through the comforter, enough to see a general scene of what was going on. "You know I never believe your stories. I'll have to do a routine check of the room."

The one with the dark, messy hair spoke up again. "By all means." He gestured towards the inside of the dorm.

Another, one with fair skin and bangs that lazily covered one eye half-grinned. "Welcome to our humble abode." He looked like he was a greaser in an old time muggle movie. Circe couldn't deny, it was kinda hot.

Professor Macmillan ignored both of them and went about searching the room. Most of it was unnecessary, flipping through drawers, rearranging shelves. All it was truly doing was causing a downright mess.

Little anxious butterflies stirred in Circe's stomach when she saw her charms professor walking towards the bed she was hiding under. She mentally congratulated herself on her quick thinking of pulling down half the comforter to shield her but if he lifted it-

"You can't look under there!' The chubby one implored.

Fair skinned, old time greaser guy chided through his teeth. _"Peter."_

Professor Macmillan walked quicker towards the bed, hand extended to pull the covers up when someone stepped in front of him.

"Ehm... sir?"

"Sirius, step out of the way." He maneuvered to get around the student but Sirius blocked his path again.

"You really shouldn't look under there, you won't like what you see."

"Mr. Black, kindly remove yourself from my path."

"No."

"Would you like to earn yourself a weeks detention, because you have got it."

"Sir-"

"The lack of respect in this dormitory is appalling! I would expect better from such well rounded students-"

Somewhere mid-rant, Circe realized that was her cue. The way the four posters were set up, in slightly spaced out rows, she could easily sneak herself from one bed to another via the side her professor was not standing on.

Before she could pend on it any longer, Sirius stated loudly. "You can't look under there because that's where I stash my condoms!"

A quick scan of her surroundings and Circe realized with disgust that he was not kidding. She held her breath, so as not to gag, and crawled to the neighboring bed.

Briefly she saw the boy with messy, dark hair give a slight nod, and heard Sirius breathe a small sigh of relief.

Professor Macmillan rolled his eyes and pulled up the covers, revealing three scattered strips of condoms splayed around. He grabbed all three and crumpled them as best he could into a ball in his fist.

"Oh don't _touch_ them-" Sirius chuckled.

"You will serve two Sunday detentions for possession of sexual objects and/or committing sexual acts, and I expect a two page essay, front and back, on my desk tomorrow, about the severity of disrespecting teachers."

"Can't I just take a third detention?"

"_Goodnight_, boys." Professor Macmillan said with finality.

He closed the door a little louder than what would be considered polite.

Reluctantly, Circe crawled out from the darkness of underneath the bed and faced the four boys all staring at her. The effects of the alcohol had now mostly worn off and she felt the full blow of embarrassment and sobriety hit her.

The lace underwear she was wearing now felt itchy and out of place, and Circe felt her cheeks burn when she saw all of their eyes on her. The last thing she wanted to do was reveal her discomfort.

"Hey." Circe grinned. "Eyes up here."

"Seriously?" The boy on the far left, with stunning green eyes and brownish hair stepped forward. "Who the hell do you think you are? You could have gotten us into weeks of consequences for your stupid little stunt! And now you've went and landed this one detention." He gestured angrily towards Sirius. "And we don't even know your bloody name!"

Unsure of how to respond, she shrugged and flashed her prettiest smile. "I'm Circe."

He rolled his eyes and flopped himself onto his four poster, mainly spent and frustrated because it was edging on 2am.

"Look," Circe's attention shifted towards the next to speak, the boy with round glasses. "Can you at least tell us what happened?"

"You know, _I_ don't know your names either." She retorted.

Quickly, he went around the room, listing names and pointing as he went. "Peter, Sirius, Remus there on the bed, and I'm James."

"Great." Circe clapped her hands to commence the story. "Then I should probably explain." She giggled but awkwardly paused when she saw the placid reactions of all four boys.

Circe leaned on the wall to get comfortable and began. "Well, some seventh years were throwing a party in the upper dorms and I was invited. Four hours in I was getting ready to leave when the authorities crashed, and it all hit the fan after that." She shrugged.

James raised an eyebrow. "And why didn't we hear about this party?"

"Oh it was a seventh year thing."

"You don't look like a seventh year."

"That's because I'm not!" Circe laughed. "I'm in sixth. But I haven't talked to a sixth year since I was in fourth!"

James, apparently bored with the conversation and subtle bragging, flopped onto his bed.

Mid-yawn he asked, "So who threw the party?"

"Regulus Black."

"Look guys, he isn't as stuck up his butt as we thought!" Sirius remarked, eyeing Circe's lack of pants and the floral wedding garter that held her wand.

"Oh, uh... no." She cleared her throat. "I didn't- We weren't- I mean,-"

The four of them jeered and laughed. "Yeah, yeah, alright then." Peter joked.

Circe shifted onto her left foot impatiently. "Okay listen. Can I crash for the night?" She nodded towards the door. "They are probably still looking for students from the party, particularly me because well... I'm not exactly on any of there good sides. I also have a thing where I hide, then mysteriously show up for breakfast the next morning, it's a talent. But I am_ really_ tired of sleeping by the lake, so... is it alright?"

Remus bit his lip. "We know nothing about you..."

Circe threw up her hands. "_Fine_. Icing gives me headaches, I have a fetish for handcuffs, and I am so exhausted right now, I can see stars."

To her satisfaction, that silenced the room, but only briefly.

Sirius laughed a very bubbly, bright laugh (it almost sounded like popcorn popping), and extended his hand.

"C'mon. You can share a bed with me."

A/N:

_Yes_, I am aware that in the actual stories Regulus is two years older than Sirius, not one. _Yes_, I know that Sirius ran away in his fifth year of Hogwarts. _Yes_, I totally did make up the names of random professors. And _yes_, I have heard how widely unpopular OCS are on this site. But I'm not going to apologize. Really, I love the Harry Potter series, and I absolutely adore the Marauders, and all I would like accomplish with this story is a good ol' cheesy romance fic. Just roll with it, can't hurt you. If the artwork caught your eye, it's from this very talented artist Viria on tumblr and deviant art. Ehm, that's about it. If there's anything left to say (which I certainly hope there is) I hope you'll leave a review for me with any suggestions, requests, or critique. Thank you so much reading!

*P.S. If you happen to be here from MDWNA, I promise I haven't given up on that story. Even though I've only just re-read it *cringe*, the next chapter will be up soon.


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